The love we give ourselves is the most important love we can give. Life is stressful enough, but especially when you are constantly in pain. Our whole lives we are being told that we need to love ourselves before we can love someone else. I don’t know about you, but I used to roll my eyes at that thinking loving someone else will help me to love myself.
The truth is they are right and wrong.
This sentiment is right in the sense of it’s important to love yourself and know who you are before you can have a deep relationship, but what if we fall out of love with ourselves? Does that mean we
Trying to Love Myself While Struggling
For a while I struggled to find myself, but I eventually started to feel proud of who I was and what I had accomplished. Once that started I eventually found myself dating my boyfriend. I realized it was because I was happy with myself and at a point in my life I was ready to love someone else.
As I started to get sicker from my car accident I started to lose myself again. I constantly felt like a horrible girlfriend and friend because I hated myself for not being able to do what everyone else my age was doing. I had to leave a job and basically be home day in and day out because I could barely move or function. I continuously went through the grieving process of who I thought I was supposed to be. After going back to work I started to feel better about myself because I was finally making money, but the truth was I wasn’t happy. I still felt like a waste of a human.
Helping Others Helped Me to Love Myself
I have always loved to write and decided to start my blog all about dealing with chronic pain. It was very therapeutic for me to get my feelings out, but at the same
I finally knew who I was supposed to be and being able to get my story out made me feel like I was doing something meaningful.
Lessons I Learned
During these couple of years, I learned a lot of hard lessons about what I could and couldn’t do because of my body. One of the most important lessons I learned was to listen to my body and knowing it’s okay to say no to things.
I learned that if I don’t listen to my body and over exert myself I will be way worse off. I learned my body can only handle working part-time and I learned that I have to be okay with it. Since I have become better at knowing my body I have been able to be more honest with myself and others on what I need especially in regards to my relationship, my work life and just my overall health.
There might be a time where I lose myself again. I am learning to be okay with it and being able to help myself to get through it.
I want everyone to know that none of us are perfect and that is okay. Life will sometimes happen when we least expect it and knowing who we are will help navigate the craziness. We may not know each other personally, but I hope that you know you are NOT alone and you will always have me at least.